If you’ve ever casually brought up the idea that your senior stop driving, you might have been met with a response you did not expect at all. It’s a hot topic, for a lot of reasons. The best idea is to prepare for the conversation as well as you can.
Remember What This Is About
Why do you need to talk to your senior about driving? That’s what you need to hold onto as this conversation gets difficult. Often aging adults who don’t want to have this talk can find lots of ways to derail the conversation or to deflect. That’s not going to be productive, so you need to avoid that pitfall. Holding onto your why is going to help with that.
Collect Your Facts
What do you already know about your senior’s driving? Is she having difficulty seeing well outside of her car, much less behind the wheel? Maybe her health has changed or her doctor has recommended that she stop driving. It’s important to make sure that you’re dealing with facts as much as possible. “I think you need to stop driving” comes across as an opinion and is easy for your senior to shoot down. “Your doctor is concerned that your vision issues interfere with your ability to drive” is fact-based.
Do Some Observational Fact Gathering, Too
If you haven’t observed your senior’s driving firsthand in a while, it might be time to give that a try, too. This is a way for you to see whether she’s paying attention to traffic laws or if she’s having trouble controlling the car. These may not be what you want to lead with, but this type of information helps you to see whether you’re overreacting or not.
Show up with Solutions in Mind
When you’re ready for the talk, make sure you have ideas for solutions with you. Bringing up a problem is always easier if you have suggestions for solutions, too. Consider whether you’d be willing to talk to her about compromises or if you would rather she let someone else, like elder care providers, take over driving duties for her. It’s important to remind her that your goal isn’t to strand her at home. You’re concerned about her safety.
This isn’t a talk you can keep putting off. If your elderly family member has been unhappy to talk about this in the past, she probably still will be. Brace yourself and make sure you’re as ready as you can be.
If you or an aging loved-one is considering elder care in Manteca, CA, please contact the caring staff at Provident Care Home Care today at (209) 578-1210.
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