Actress Ashley Judd says it best. “Self-care isn’t selfish.” If you’re not taking care of yourself, you’ll run into issues down the road. You might feel fine today, a week from now, and months later, hit a wall.
When you care for your parents, you have to put your own needs first. Not only does that mean taking care of yourself by seeing a doctor regularly, but it also means taking care of your mental and emotional health.
Almost 67% of unpaid caregivers for older adults report having at least one mental health symptom. Nearly 33% admit to having depression, anxiety, or relying on substances to cope during the challenging moments.
If you’re caring for others, you have to care for yourself. It shouldn’t be an afterthought. Otherwise, you become one of the numbers who experience anxiety, excessive stress, depression, etc., and simply cannot keep offering the care their parents need. Self-care is everything.
Join a Support Group
The best thing you can do is join a support group. Surround yourself with other family caregivers who understand what you’re going through. It can be a virtual group or an in-person group held at a local hospital, church, or senior center.
Know When to Say No
You have to set limits. Siblings were helping their parents with transportation, meals, housekeeping, errands, and bills. Your brother helps with yard work, but he’s recently reached out to you to have you take over that aspect of their care. He’s working extra hours, and he’s just too busy.
As much as you’d like to help your other family members, your self-care has to be your primary focus. Your parents’ care is next. It’s okay to tell your brother no. He can find another option.
Leave Yourself an Hour to Unwind
One hour a day can make a big difference. Set aside one hour each day for “me time.” During that time, do something for yourself. It might be spending an hour reading, soaking in a warm bath, or doing your favorite exercise program.
During that hour, make sure others know they cannot bother you unless it’s an emergency. They need to respect your need for time alone.
Hire Home Care Aides to Support You
Pair the help you offer your mom and dad with companion care at home services. You can’t be the only one helping them 24/7. You need time for self-care, to visit friends, and to run errands. Call a home care agency and ask about companion care at home aides in your area.
Sources:
https://www.apa.org/monitor/2020/11/numbers-stress-caregivers
If you or an aging loved one is considering companion care at home in Moraga, CA, please contact the caring staff at Provident Care Home Care today at (209) 578-1210.
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